Another Conservative Blog Secret Memorandum Found: Hopefully Exploited
President Obama and his Democrat machine are sputtering mad over the huge opposition to it’s healthcare hostile takeover. Mary Katheran Ham over at the Weekly Standard has a great column about how Think Progress (a liberal bog – and I mean ‘bog’) transformed a conservative PAC that donated under two thousand dollars to the Republican Party into a nationwide empire that is sending well-dressed weekend protesters into town hall meetings enraged. Right Principles PAC has let slip a secret memo, you see, and now the left sees where comes all these programmed revolutionaries that are repeating its mantras and high-stepping to its orders. It’s the Mein Kampf of the Tea Party Party!
Unlike the secretive Right Principles PAC, we here at Political Vindication are more than willing to hand over our secret memos to Think Progress. Hell, we’d even give them to the Daily Kos, but none of those drones over there can read, so it really wouldn’t do much good. But we’re not so proud here at PV that we wouldn’t sell ourselves, or our memos, for fame. In fact, here’s one we’ll give the libs for free. Feel free to make a billboard out of it!
Secret Memo.
[Memo not to be secreted, but to remain secretive pending worldwide viral success as an exposed double top secret underground communique:]
1) Find out about your local Democrat’s next meeting. Show up early, get organized, sit in front and challenge your liberal Obamatron with pointed questions and snarky retorts (guffaws and harrumphs are suggested). If you must bring a book with you for protection, make it Alinsky’s Rules For Radicals, as Liberty And Tyranny will probably get you arrested.
2) Once you’re done dehumanizing your drone and whipping up the rented extras, find a reporter or a very good looking woman and repeat your succinct argument against government run healthcare and the perils of the public plan. Then feign a massive coronary, throw yourself to the ground to writhe in extraordinary pain for several minutes, contorting your body into excruciating geometric shapes. Then jump to your feet and announce plaintively “In Obama’s America, they would have euthanized me before my prescription was filled.” Women love performance art.
3) By no means carry pies or rotting fruit, wear kaffiyehs, chain yourself to doors or lay down in front of bulldozers, attack speakers or carry signs calling for another Jewish holocaust. This kind of behavior will not only get you killed, but will probably get you smeared in pachouli oil by a lovestruck communist who came to the representative’s town hall for the free HIV tests.
4) After the meeting all rented polo shirts and khaki pants must be turned in to Javier at PV headquarters by 9pm (with no stains). Leather loafers (with gel insert) should be returned clean, as should wigs, hairpieces, gaudy jewelry and American flags. If you haven’t already, please fill out the direct deposit form so that your ‘volunteer’ check will find you before you sell off our polos, pants, loafers and hair pieces on E-Bay. It’s expensive to fund a nationwide revolution – please return our shit when you’re done posing as a well-dressed revolutionary.
Remember – this memo is SECRET. If it were ever to get out and get picked up by some leftist reactionary group, all our plans to infiltrate Dear Leader’s government and steal his cigarettes would be doomed.
Rise America!
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